Better Than Caffeine


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The wonderful Priscilla Presley turns 68. 32-23-33. Actress, businesswoman. 

Dallas, Naked Gun Trilogy, Melrose Place. 

Met Elvis Presley when she was 14 at a U.S. Air Force base in West Germany. They married eight years later. Divorced in '73. Her fragrance line including Moments, Experiences, Indian Summer, Roses and More. Moments was worth $90 million a year in 1996. Turned down the part as one of the "angels" in the television series "Charlie's Angels" (1976).

Enjoy the long weekend.

Euro Tour Chief's Garcia Apology Requires Its Own Apology!



You really can't make this stuff up. European PGA Tour chief George O'Grady (on left above) attempt to come to Sergio Garcia's defense came off far less than stellar. So much that the battered Garcia felt compelled to apologize for O'Grady's faux pas. 

What's worse, O'Grady's "apology" was no doubt prepared beforehand. Amazing. 

Golf’s racism row took another ugly turn yesterday when the chief executive of the European Tour was forced to apologise for using inappropriate language on television.

Ironically, George O’Grady was trying to defend Sergio Garcia’s ‘fried chicken’ apology to Tiger Woods when he sparked another storm.

“We accept all races on the European Tour, we take it very strongly; most of Sergio’s friends happen to be very, er, are coloured athletes in the United States.”’ he said. 

Garcia said: ‘Obviously I was playing so I didn’t hear him say it but I have heard about it, and I think it’s unfortunate.’

Meanwhile, Garcia said he spoke with Woods' agent Mark Steinberg.

"I talked to [Woods's agent] Mark Steinberg and he said to move forward," Garcia said. "But hopefully I will get the chance to talk to Tiger in person and, if not, I hope to see him at the US Open and we can talk face to face there."

While malicious intent always needs to be evaluated when these incidents occur, these recent quotes sadly tend to perpetuate those Caddyshack perceptions that the world of golf is out of touch with current social protocols. 


Tomorrow On The Teebox



Tomorrow morning its a Special Colonial edition of the Teebox.

The run list includes;

--The Sergio vs. Tiger imbroglio + a nugget on when Woods first began his dislike of Garcia

--Deep Colonial notes

--Rant on the extensive sponsor exemptions 14-yr-old Guan Tianlang has received

--And at 9:10, Craig and I ponder why not doing this while driving is against the law

We'll do it all from Crest Cars in Plano this Saturday morning from 8-10. 

Oh, don't forget our Colonial Wrap Up show at 5p Sunday afternoon on The Ticket...


Better Than Caffeine


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Kelly Monaco
is 37 today. 34D-22-32. Pinup girl, actress, model. 

General Hospital, Baywatch, Mumford, Dancing With the Stars, BASEketball. 

Suffered hearing loss while scuba diving. One of the most popular Playboy Playmates ever ('97)--just ask our Publisher Robert Rodriguez. Played soccer, swimming, track and softball in high school. Was a real lifeguard before starring in Baywatch. 

The Sergio Backlash Continues



Previously, no golfer really had bowed up to Tiger Woods before Sergio Garcia’s public disdain of Woods. It made for an intriguing duel except that Garcia has never beaten Tiger head to head (don’t count the lame battle at Bighorn).

Sadly, the smack talk has come to an unfortunate end due to Garcia’s “fried chicken” comment.

The aftershocks have been swift and plentiful ranging from outrage to pity.

Jason Whitlock of thinks both Sergio and Tiger blew this one. 

Garcia’s mishap is a reminder for me to be on guard to avoid making a similar mistake. It’s also a reminder to avoid the fallacy that the key to promoting racial harmony is the avoidance of discussing race. It’s the equivalent of believing the key to beating cancer is ignoring any sign of it in hopes that it will just go away.

Tiger Woods is quite adept at sidestepping the subject of race. And perhaps that’s why golf pretty much looks and sounds the same as it did when he won the 1997 Masters.'s Michael Rosenberg thinks this doesn't mean Garcia is a racist, but does confirm he's the consummate whiner. 

He is a whiner (he just admitted this to, and he is petty, and he thinks every dark cloud in the sky is staring at him. He loses his poise because he worries about the wrong things. And evidently he needs to improve his joke repertoire. But that doesn't necessarily make him racist.

Tom English of the Scottsman believes that Garcia's comment made the unthinkable possible. 

By the time he had finished his mea culpa you almost started to feel some pity for him. Woods is not only trouncing him on the golf course but he’s also trouncing him off it. Woods has the career that Garcia always wanted. At one time, many years ago now, these two looked like they were going to form the rivalry of 
the age but Garcia has been a profound disappointment on that score.

The only thing the Spaniard has achieved in the last 24 hours was to make a sympathetic character out of Woods – a hell of a feat beyond the ken of so many who are paid to do it, but now achieved, ironically, by the man who dislikes him more than most.

By the way, for the many who enjoy their fried chicken (or watermelon for that matter), here's a decent explanation via Wikipedia how the term came to be as a racial epithet. 

Since the American Civil War, traditional slave foods like fried chicken, watermelon, and chitterlings have suffered a strong association with African American stereotypes and blackface minstrelsy. This was commercialized for the first half of the 20th century by restaurants like Sambo's and Coon Chicken Inn, which selected exaggerated depictions of blacks as mascots, implying quality by their association with the stereotype. Although also being acknowledged positively as "soul food" today, the affinity that African American culture has for fried chicken has been considered a delicate, often pejorative issue. While the perception of fried chicken as an ethnic dish has been fading for several decades, with the ubiquity of fried chicken dishes in the US, it persists as a racial stereotype.

Bottom line is in this age of immediate social networking, everyone (not just celebrities)  need to be extremely careful when uttering a dicey "joke" no matter the venue (as caddie Stevie Williams found out).  

Also, wondering if the PR folks at TaylorMade/Adidas would've liked Garcia to go logo-less during the apology presser...


How Not To Celebrate Winning A Hole In One Car



Somehow with my luck, this is how I envision the wheels-off aftermath of winning a car for hitting an ace. 

Mike Miller was so happy with the prized car, he attempted to reenact Tour player Rich Beem’s celebration for doing the same. Except, Miller’s outcome was decidedly south of positive.  


“I completely missed the hood and landed on my backside in the middle of the windshield,” Miller said. “I am so thankful it didn’t completely shatter or I would’ve gone straight through.

“The mood went from everyone being all excited to, ‘Oh my God, what did you just do?’ ”


“I’m saying to myself, ‘What’s he jumping on?’ ” Bob Miller said. “The next thing I know, he’s on the windshield. Thank God he turned his body around. Thank God he went backwards. If he would’ve landed on his face, who knows what might’ve happened to the kid?”

Bummer: Tianlang Receives Yet Another Sponsor Exemption



Right after Jack Nicklaus wrongly granted 14-year-old amateur Guan Tianlang an exemption, the FedEx St. Jude Classic offered one as well. 

Sheesh! Really? I get wanting extra butts in the seats (Jack's Memorial Invitational doesn't need the extra pub) but how much is too much for the continuation of Tianlang's excellent summer vacation? He can't win any money and is taking a valuable spot from players striving to make a living. 

In addition, due to the Memorial invite, Tianlang withdrew from the U.S. Open qualifier at Lakewood CC in Dallas. Not sure why as he could've still entered if he missed the cut at Memorial. 

I'm very concerned that golf's latest curiosity will join a long sad line of kids burned out from the heap of great expectations on his very young shoulders...

Better Than Caffeine


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Alison Eastwood 
is 41. 32-24-35. Yes, Clint's daughter. Actress. 

Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil, Tightrope, Absolute Power. 

A rebellious teenager growing up. Received a fine and three years' probation after a drunk-driving arrest in 1991. Kicked a drugs and alcohol addiction at age twenty. Was conceived during the production of Dirty Harry (1971). Posed for Playboy at age 30. 

She certainly makes our day.  


Wanna Get Away Sergio?


Just when you think Sergio Garcia has maybe matured (or at least dare bowing up to Tiger Woods), he sticks his big 'ol foot down his throat. His long feud with Woods escalated the last few weeks when Garcia thought Tiger grandstanded pulling a wood while Garcia was in mid swing at the Players Championship. 

Yesterday at a European Tour black tie event, Garcia was asked in jest by GolfChannel's Steve Sands if "he would invite Tiger Woods to dinner at the U.S. Open."

Garcia: "We will have him round every night. We will serve fried chicken."

Uh oh. 

At the very least it wasn't funny. At the very worst it was idiotic and ignorant with possible racial overtones. Like the living ghost of Fuzzy Zoeller was channeling thru El Nino. 

With his PR firm in full damage control, Garcia apologized...

“I apologize for any offense that may have been caused by my comment on stage during the European Tour Players’ Awards dinner. I answered a question that was clearly made towards me as a joke with a silly remark, but in no way was the comment meant in a racist manner.”

Garcia's club manufacturer TaylorMade put this out: 

"Sergio Garcia’s recent comment was offensive & in no way aligns with TaylorMade-adidas Golf’s values & corporate culture."

In the meantime, Woods offered up responses via his Twitter account. 

"The comment that was made wasn't silly. It was wrong, hurtful and clearly inappropriate."

"I'm confident that there is real regret the comment was made."

The Players ended two weeks ago and it's long past time to move on and talk about golf."

This morning, Garcia met the firing squad for about 7 minutes at the BMW PGA Championship to expand on his apology. 

"I was caught off-guard by the question, but don't get me wrong. My answer was totally stupid and out of place."

He also said that he'd never heard Zoeller's "fried chicken" comment at the '98 Masters--one that cost Zoeller several endorsement deals (Garcia was 17 at the time).  

There's no way Jack Nicklaus allows the two to be paired in the first two rounds at Memorial next week...does he? Either way, Garcia better expect less than a heartfelt welcome by the Memorial gallery--and for a guy with thin skin that should be an interesting watch how he reacts and plays.

Too Much Too Soon For Guan Tianlang?


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Jack Nicklaus granted Guan Tianlang an exemption into his Memorial Invitational. Yes, he's  talented, polite and fairly mature for a 14-year-old, but I'm not a big fan of him  receiving more sponsor exemptions for events that don't need the extra pub (Tiger Woods is playing the event).

We know he can make a pro cut at this point, but Tianlang isn't gonna win any time soon and giving up a spot to an amateur before a pro doing it for a living just doesn't seem right. It merely looks like carnival plate-spinning. 

FYI, Tianlang is the 86th ranked amateur in the world...

And, Tianlang withdrew from the upcoming U.S. Open qualifier at Lakewood CC in Dallas. 

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